Slowing Down Isn’t Failing: Lessons from a Leash and a Jog
Not too long ago, I went for a run. Now, to be clear—I don’t run often, and when I do, it’s slow and short. But I always feel better afterward. This time, I had some special companions: my daughter in a stroller and our dog, Ginger—a golden retriever/lab mix who lives for moments like these. Just the sight of my running shoes sends her into a tail-wagging frenzy.
We headed into the canyon near our home, the river running alongside us and the air just the right kind of cool. Everything felt perfect. Downhill stretches always trick me into thinking I’m an athlete, so I was feeling great after the first mile.
But as we began climbing back uphill, I noticed Ginger falling behind. She wasn’t physically tired—not yet—but she kept looking over her shoulder. Cyclists whizzed by, and every one of them seemed to rattle her. Instead of focusing on me and our direction, she got caught up in everything happening around her. When I could get her attention, she’d visibly relax and catch back up. But the more she fixated on potential threats, the more she lagged behind, anxious and unsure.
And then it hit me: we're all a little like Ginger.
We start out strong, full of good intentions and energy. But along the way, anxiety creeps in. We start looking sideways—at what others are doing, at what might go wrong, at past missteps—and suddenly we lose momentum. Fear starts calling the shots.
Sure, Ginger was a little tired. And so are we sometimes. As Vince Lombardi once said, “Fatigue makes cowards of us all.” When we’re worn down, fear has an easier time convincing us to stop, to play small, or to turn around. Anxiety thrives when we’re tired and distracted.
That night on the trail, I realized how often I do the same thing—how often I let fear of failure, rejection, or disappointment slow me down. Sometimes, we don’t even realize we’ve hit pause. We just keep scanning the horizon for what might go wrong instead of looking ahead to where we want to go.
Like my brother-in-law, who once told me he never washes his car because every time he does, it rains. It sounds silly, but don’t we do this too? We avoid doing things that might not “last.” We don’t clean, write, create, or grow—because what’s the point if it’s just going to get messy again?
But life is messy. And we’re meant to keep moving through it anyway.
That’s why we need regular refueling—not just with food, but with encouragement, perspective, and tools to stay focused. You wouldn’t skip meals just because you’ll get hungry again. So why skip the habits that energize you just because the boost might not last forever?
Here are a few simple practices that help me stay focused on the run:
1. Use positive language.
Instead of saying, “Don’t forget,” say “Remember to…” This small shift helps your brain focus on what you want to do, not what you’re trying to avoid. It works wonders with kids—and with your own inner dialogue.
2. Add the word “yet.”
“I can’t do this” becomes “I can’t do this yet.” One little word can turn a dead end into a detour.
3. Think small.
Don’t try to clean the whole house. Just dust the bookshelf. Shrinking the goal helps build momentum.
4. Use music.
Upbeat music can give you a boost when you’re dragging. Gentle tunes can help calm anxiety. Choose your playlist with purpose.
5. Chew gum.
Seriously. It’s weirdly effective. Sometimes your body just needs a simple, sensory reset.
So here’s the big takeaway: Focus on where you’re going, not everything that might go wrong along the way.
You might not move fast. That’s okay. Just keep your eyes forward—and keep going.
Questions to Reflect & Take Action:
What distractions or fears are pulling your focus away from the direction you want to go?
Where can you use the word “yet” to reframe a limitation in your life?
What’s one small step you can take today—just dust the bookshelf—to build momentum?
Want help staying focused? Share what’s holding you back in the comments—I’d love to hear your story.